the ‘tortured artist’ cliche. nooow i get it.
so we have a problem — to stay or leave is the question. i have been working at a corporate office for 16 months now. i don’t know if i dig it. i was hoping to use my creativity at the company but after designing a webpage, a lot of banners and the gift card carrier for them, i pretty much got bored of the repetition of all the other tasks i had to do which i did not enjoy doing (aka HATE doing).
after alt, i got to thinking. there are beautiful, smart, CREATIVE, successful women out there — they do exist! which gave me vast hope. i now got to see visually how i can chase my dream and somehow make a living doing it.
and just because i can do my job at the office very well, does not mean that i should do it.
no regrets, however. i’ve learned a lot about the real world. i graduated college in 2009 … been in the hustle ‘n’ bustle (creating no art). Three years passed. What have i done creatively that i can be proud of? nothing.
this needs to change. i need to express myself. otherwise i don’t feel like myself. i can’t just fit in a cookie cutter.
i need to shut out the ‘critical parent voice’ in my head and just, well, go for it. do the crazy/right thing and leave my job. follow my dream. my dream of being a poor, but genuinely REAL artist.
the next time i’m back, i hope i will have created…. something.